"When I think of President Kennedy, I think of what Shakespeare said in Romeo and Juliet...
'When he shall die, Take him and cut him out in little stars, And he shall make the face of heaven so fine That all the world will be in love with night, And pay no worship to the garish sun.'"
When he was finished speaking, he left the hall, sat on a fire escape, and wept.
My students often ask me, "You really admire Robert Kennedy, huh?" My answer usually is simple, "yes, I do." Of course this is generally followed by the traditional early adolescent reply of "why"? I rarely have a problem answering the straight forward question of why...at least when it's asked respectively. If not, you're usually going to get a continued response of "what" or you'll be completely ignored. The question does arise, why? Everyone has heroes they admire from youth. Our house had the Kennedys. Books lined the shelves. Posters on the wall. VHS tapes in the cabinets. Yes, I said VHS - remember those? My mother had a particular interest in the Kennedys and specifically with Jack. Perhaps this same fascination was within me waiting to be released. Or, maybe it at least planted the seeds. Jack Kennedy, while I can both respect and admire the man...there were aspects of which I could never, and can never, fully connect. The younger brother struck me. A man who's spirit was both woundable and from that pain, amiable. We no longer value change in politics or even life. The idea of perfection is lifted up above all others. The idea of grace is a great topic for sermons, books, household conversation...yet, talk is all that it remains. We rarely can forgive those who make mistakes, even if they grow from them. Therefore we settle for what we believe is perfect, another self-deception. I cannot connect with that and I refuse to connect with that belief. I choose to cheer and connect with the man who "...even in [his] sleep, pain which cannot forget falls drop by drop upon [his] heart, and in [his] own despair, against [his] will, comes wisdom to [him] by the awful grace of God. To enter suffering, be affected by it, and grow for the betterment of others is not an easy life....however, it's a life poured out. I cannot connect to that in action but I can connect to it in desire. I long for a heart that is willing to be broken and contrite. Bobby was such a leader. Jack Newfield says it best, "He was not really built for the spotlight, he was built for the wings. He had to fight against a basic shyness, a basic nervousness in public. Many times, I would stand behind the stage and I would see his leg shaking during his speech, or his hands shaking, he wasn't... a natural but that all had to change when his brother was assassinated. And I think change is the motif of his whole life and career." As life has moved on, I now share the same fascination as my mother. A fascination with two brothers long gone...with the lives they lived. The respect comes not from the perfection or lack of perfection - but the respect comes from the ability to change, to grow, to admit faults, and the utmost - to live and serve for others. Perhaps, one day, this can truly be said of all of us.
"He really becomes something much larger than what he was when he began. He becomes stronger through suffering." -Jeff Shesol
1 Comments:
John Kennedy was of my time.. he was the first president I was Aware of! We watched his inauguration on TV in school I had never seen one before.. or cared.. He was the first President I knew that talked about War (the Cuban crisis) He was the first President I had known to be killed I was then in the 6th grade.I don't think I knew then, but I realized later he was going to change the world as I would have know it.. We will never know what could have happened.. I maybe would not have had friends killed in Nam... He was our hero.. I see a lot of Bobby in You and am thrilled that you admire him so, and even happier that you share your insights with me.
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